30 Funny Dad Jokes

Funny Dad Jokes

Dad jokes are the perfect mix of cheesy, groan-worthy, and oddly endearing. Whether you’ve heard them from your own dad or you just love a good pun, these jokes are sure to brighten your day. Get ready to roll your eyes and laugh out loud!

Why don’t skeletons fight each other?

They don’t have the guts.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

Because it felt crummy.

Why don’t oranges ever win races?

They run out of juice.

I used to hate facial hair…

But then it grew on me.

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.

Animal Jokes

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she’ll let it go.

Why don’t oysters share their pearls?

Because they’re shellfish.

What do you call a fish wearing a crown?

A kingfish.

Why did the chicken join a band?

Because it had the drumsticks!

Food Jokes

Why don’t eggs tell jokes?

They’d crack up.

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded?

There was nothing left but de-brie.

What did the grape do when he got stepped on?

Nothing, but he let out a little wine.

Why don’t we ever tell secrets in a cornfield?

Because it’s full of ears.

Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing!

Puns

I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.

So I loafed around.

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot.

Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?

He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.

Why can’t a bicycle stand up by itself?

It’s two-tired.

I would tell you a joke about an elevator, but…

It’s an uplifting experience.

Seasonal Jokes

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite.

Why don’t crabs give to charity?

Because they’re shellfish.

What did one snowman say to the other?

Do you smell carrots?

How does a snowman get around?

By riding an “icicle.”

Why are ghosts bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them.

Bonus Groaners

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don’t know y.

Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground?

They woke up.

What do you call a factory that makes good products?

A satisfactory.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.

What’s brown and sticky?

A stick.

There you have it—30 of the finest (or worst, depending on who you ask) dad jokes to make your day a little brighter. Share these with a friend, your dad, or anyone who needs a good groan-laugh combo!

Got a dad joke you love? Drop it in the comments below—we can never have too many!